Personally I find those Bluetooth earpieces one of the least attractive pieces of technology ever invented — unless you want to look as if you’ve never had sex.

So I started thinking about past identifiers of male social cluelessness, and passing by the much-maligned pocket protector I hit upon slide rules. My father used to keep them on his drafting table, and before I learned that girls just want to be seen as having fun, I even thought about taking one of them to junior high school, along with the thick Penguin novels that I showed off at every opportunity.

But I never knew that slide rules could be cylindrical. Or just discs. I never knew that the scales could multiply and change for specialized applications. I never knew just how geeky useful they could be.

Scientific American has a nice illustrated article on the history of slide rules in its May 2006 issue. Better yet, they have instructions on how to make your own accurate slide rule — which they also provide as an online PDF set of instructions.

They aren’t the only ones. Apparently people make all kinds of slide rules all the time, including an interactive Java slide rule. Who’d a thunk it?

(Note to Bluetooth headset wearers: slide rules are safely retro now, and much cooler than Bluetooth, and cheaper, but they still don’t impress most women. Try a motorcycle. )

Slide rule collections

• Todd Tolhurst’s Collection
• John Wolff’s Web Museum
• Giovanni Pastore’s page (with some quite ancient examples)
• Dave’s Online Nest (includes links and a primer)
• The Museum of HP Calculators has an extensive section on slide rules and their history
• Kent Walker’s Collection

Stores and Repairs

• Selection of semi-collectible slide rules (cheap!)
• The Slide Rule Trading Company sells and repairs slide rules
• Psychrometric slide rules (for weather calculations)

I know there are more technological markers of desperate sexual transference — which might actually double as genuinely useful tools. Please submit yours.

Posted by Antony in: General